Smarty pants

So, I got the word today from Steph that my lil bug made the Kindergarten Honor Roll. I didn't know there was such a thing, but there is, and he's on it. He is so smart! Always has been. I can't believe the lil guy I raised for 4 and a half years is almost six now and a Kindergarten genius. Not to mention a star at his kung fu school and rockin the piano lessons. I miss him! In honor of this...honor, a picture of DJ on his first day of Preschool:

Sometimes, when I listen to a song, I'm struck by how much the lyrics remind me of how I felt at some point in my life, or even how I am feeling at that present moment. Kris Allen's album came out today, and his song "The Truth" couldn't be more true to how I think both Todd and I felt when we decided to split up and get a divorce.

Lyin' next to you
Wishing I could disappear
Let you fall asleep
And vanish out into thin air

It's the elephant in the room
And we pretend that we don't see it.
It's the avalanche that looms above our heads.
And we don't believe it.

Tryin' to be perfect
Tryin' not to let you down
Honesty is honestly the hardest thing for me right now
while the floors underneath our feet are crumbling
The walls we built together tumblin'
I still stand here holdin' up the roof
Cause it's easier than telling the truth.

I still keep your photographs
I remember how we used to laugh
I can keep on losin' sleep
If you're okay with being torn in half.

It's the elephant in the room
And we pretend that we don't see it.
It's an avalanche that looms above our heads
But we don't believe it.

Tryin' to be perfect, tryin' not to let you down
Honesty is honestly the hardest thing for me right now
While the floors underneath our feet are crumblin'
The walls we built together tumblin'
I still stand here holdin' up the roof
Cause it's easier than telling the truth.

Stop ignoring that our hearts are mourning
And let the rain come in.
Stop pretending that it's not ending
And let the end begin.

Oh yeah...

Tryin' to be perfect, tryin' not to let you down
Honesty is honestly the hardest thing for me right now
While the floors underneath our feet are crumblin'
The walls we built together tumblin'
I still stand here holdin' up the roof
Cause it's easier than telling the truth.

It's easier than telling the truth...

The lines:
Stop ignoring that our hearts are mourning
And let the rain come in.
Stop pretending that it's not ending
And let the end begin.

so completely describe how those days felt, when we were trying to decide what to do.

The Truth - Kris Allen

Because I was told to do this...

50 Things You Possibly Didn't Know About Me [But Now You Do]

1. What is in the back seat of your car right now? Probably some CD's, a book, my reuseable grocery bags, maybe a jacket, a few other odds and ends

2. What's your favorite curse word? I don't have one

3. Name 3 people who made you smile today? I didn't see anyone today

4. What were you doing at 8 am this morning? sleeping

5. What were you doing 30 minutes ago? watching TV

6. Have you ever been to a strip club? No

7. What is the last thing you said aloud? Probably something to the dogs

8. What is the best ice cream flavor? I don't eat ice cream

9. What was the last thing you had to drink? Water

10. What are you wearing right now? gray pants, white shirt

11. What was the last thing you ate? Turkey sandwich

12. Have you bought any new clothing items this week? Yes, I got Christmas pajamas a couple days ago

13. When was the last time you ran? I don't run. It hurts my back.

14. What's the last sporting event you watched? Seahawks game yesterday. So sad.

15. Who is the last person you sent a comment/message on facebook? Either Jessica or Chandra

16. Ever go camping? Yes

17. Do you have a tan? No

18. Do you drink your soda from a straw? Sometimes

19. What did your last text message say? Ummm.... "Definitely"

20. Are you someone's best friend? Yes

21. What are you doing tomorrow? Going home to my grandparents house for a little while, going by my storage unit to drop some things off and try to find a couple things, then back here to do some homework.

22. where is your mom right now? At home, probably watching TV

23. Look to your left, what do you see? Printer

24. What color is your watch? I don't have one, but I'm pretty sure I'm getting one for Christmas

25. What do you think of when you think of Australia? Bekka. She was obsessed with it and wanted to go so badly in her lifetime. She never made it because her life was cut very short, very suddenly.

26. Ever ridden on a roller coaster? Yes

27. What is your birthstone? Diamond

28. Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? I am trying not to eat fast food anymore

29. What is your favorite number? 7, 11

30. Do you have a dog? Not officially, but I am a caretaker for 2 Anatolian Shepherds.

31. Last person you talked to on the phone? My mom

32. Have you met anyone famous? Yep

33. Any plans today? Today is almost over. I did a little grocery shopping, did the laundry, and some homework

34. How many states have you lived in? 3, Washington, Connecticut, and Maryland. In that order (then back to Washington and back to Maryland and back to Washington again!)

35. Ever go to college? Yes, right after high school, that lasted for 9 months, and now I'm going back, after 10 years.

36. Where are you right now? Bedroom

37. Biggest annoyance in your life right now? It's hard to say, there are a few things bothering me

38. Last song listened to? Take A Bow - Lea Michele (Glee Cast)

39. Are you allergic to anything? A bunch of stuff

40. Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time? I lost my favorite shoes in this last move. They are in storage somewhere.

41. Are you jealous of anyone? Not that I can think of.

42. Is anyone jealous of you? I doubt it

43. Do you love anyone? Yes

44. Do any of your friends have children? Yes

45. Do you eat healthy? Getting better about it

46. What do you usually do during the day? homework, take care of the animals, help my family, housework

47. Do you hate anyone right now? No. Hate Accomplishes nothing.

48. Do you use the word 'hello' daily? Yes

49. Have you ever been to Six Flags? Yes

50. How did you get one of your scars? I have a bunch of tiny scars on my stomach from 2 separate surgeries for 2 totally unrelated things.

Rain

The occasional rainy day is kinda nice. It makes everything smell fresh, keeps things green, the air clean. However, when it rains for days, weeks, on end, I really begin to hate the rain. I realize that I live in Washington, 4th generation, I choose to be here. I have also lived in other places, other states, and for all the differences there are, there is one common factor: Rain. No matter where I have lived, where I have visited, it rains. I know there are places in this world where rain is rare, and some places where it rains every single day. When we lived in Connecticut, it was winter, so mostly, it only snowed, but that's just colder, stickier, more slippery rain. In Maryland, it rained A LOT. In Japan, it rained every day we were there, but it was their rainy season. Here in Washington, it barely rained all summer, but since we hit september, it rains at least 3-4 days a week, if not every day. Sometimes, its nice during the day and only rains at night, but it rains. Its cold outside, being almost winter, which makes the rain more miserable, for some reason. I can't go outside and take a walk. Well, I could, but I tend to get sick when I do that. Ok, ok, enough about rain. I can't escape it.

Life is...well, life. School keeps me extremely busy, and when I'm not buried in homework, I'm taking care of the animals (who also don't like the rain, by the way), or going home to help my mom with my grandparents. Sometimes I get a break and get to visit my best friend, Jessica, but that doesn't happen as often as I would like. Thanksgiving is just a week away and Christmas is just a few weeks after that.

Thanksgiving is going to be amazing. It's one of my favorite days of the year. I get to see all my family, there will be close to 60 people this year. I volunteered to make Pumpkin Muffins, so that will be fun. My grandma's family is Swedish, so there is so much food and everyone is talking and laughing. Sometimes we play games, and the night usually ends with all of us sitting around, watching slides of family photos. Some from way back when my great-grandparents were still alive, to the most current family photos. It's so great to see the history, the fun we've all had over the years. See the loved ones we have lost. Last year, on Thanksgiving, we lost my great-aunt Dorothy. She was my grandma's oldest sister and such a sweet lady. I was in Maryland last Thanksgiving, and it was nice, but not the same.

I am hoping to be able to see some of my dad's family over the holidays, this year. I have never met any of them, other than my dad. I have talked to my Aunt, on facebook, but I hope to meet her soon and my grandmother too. Maybe my uncles and some cousins, one of these days. Family is the most important thing!

Ok, I have a paper due for Geography on Agricultural Biotechnology, that I need to get back to. I would be out taking a walk, but it's RAINING!!!

Mid-Terms, Winter Q, and the future, oh my!

So, Friday was mid-term, which, really, it's not the middle of the term, so I don't understand why it's mid-terms, but whatever. I just do the homework, I don't make the schedule. I have no idea how I did, but I'm not too worried.

Registration for Winter Quarter is tomorrow morning at 7:30, so I've set my alarm to wake up at 7:30, even though I will probably go back to sleep as soon as I'm done. That's just too early. In any event, it looks like Winter Q will be Math, Anthropology and Intro to Poetry. I want to take a drama class, but the prof has gotten really bad reviews and sounds kinda scary, so I will wait on that one til I talk to my dad and see if he knows him and what he thinks.

The future...yikes. Only 5 months left til the scary 3-0. Why is it scary? Because 30 seems so OLD!!! Maybe because I'm divorced, I have no kids, no social life, blah blah, etc.

Why is it everytime I sit down to blog, my brain goes blank and I can't remember what I wanted to say in the first place?! Either that, or I get interrupted. Oh well. Maybe I will try again later...